There are times I go out of control to gain control; this is when I am not being spiritual or intellectual at all.
Many times, over the years, I have said and done things that produce harm to others. At that moment, I feel perfectly justified because they are not doing what I want, when I want it, as quickly as I want.
In general, when I blow up and then cool down, I feel better, but those who have been the target of my bitter diatribe are reeling, not feeling good about themselves or me. I have transferred my pain to the other. Ouch!
This can happen so quickly and unknowingly and when I pass the point of no return; it is almost impossible to get out of the tirade.
Today I work hard to keep my emotions at the forefront of my mind. It is very important I remain emotionally mature and able to assess my own mood and act accordingly. If I am feeling fine, I go about life in my usual manner. If I am anxious or emotional, I need to cautiously approach others or events, and assessing accurately can sometimes be the problem.
I love the question, If I could go back and repeat this same situation, how would I do it differently?
Things Like:
What has me in this anxious place?
Let me sit down before I speak.
How can I enroll others and not demand?
What do I really want?
What do I want others and myself to say about me when this is over?
What do I need to say about myself?
Asking these questions equips me to become intentional and strategic about events like this in the future.
Situations repeat, and when I know how I want to approach it next time, I am equipped.
There is no guarantee that you will employ my new strategy in every situation. It takes practice.
Learning from my mistakes and seeing what I can do keep me from going out of control to gain control.
I want to always be in search of building a bitter me.
Did I say bitter? No, I choose better, not bitter.
Watch for the blind spots.
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Blind Spots in Relationships
What I don't know I don't know about myself
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