I was talking to a friend the other day, and it seemed the only words they had to say about themselves were stupid, worthless, loser, ugly, and too many more self-beat-up kinds of words.
Wow! I can remember the times in my life when I felt similar. Interestingly, these words can still bubble to the surface at times. Self-beat-up can be a mood-changer for me. I love it when life is full of wins. I don’t exhibit bad self-conversation when times are good. If life takes a swing to the negative, then look out. Too often, I feel I let someone down, made a mistake, or failed somehow. This is when I wrap myself in the negative word blanket. Old habits are hard to break, but If I hold on to negative self-talk, I will remain negative, drastically affecting my mood.
Hearing negative things as children or being put down or bullied creates the seedbed that spawns these negative comments. Having negativity etched in my mind can be challenging to process healthily. Returning to that old familiar behavior during stress or duress is too easy.
Self-criticism chips away at my self-esteem and confidence. It can lead to heightened levels of anxiety and stress as I constantly worry about my perceived shortcomings and failures. Continually telling myself I am not good enough or will fail can create a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Engaging in positive self-talk and acknowledging my strengths and accomplishments can boost self-esteem and self-confidence. Self-compassion and understanding can help reduce stress and anxiety by fostering a more balanced and realistic perspective. It can help regulate my emotions more effectively, allowing me to manage stress, anger, and other challenging emotions healthily and constructively. Healthy self-conversation involves kindness, compassion, respect, and cultivating a mindset of self-awareness and self-acceptance.
Acknowledging mistakes as opportunities for growth and remembering that we are all works in progress is a great way to overcome self-beat-up.
How about you? Are you saying kind or harsh things about yourself?
Watch for the blind spots.
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